Donning the Mantilla

Much controversy surrounds this beautiful act of humility before the Lord; this age-old custom/tradition of our faith. Many claim that the Church mandates the covering of a woman's head when entering the presence of God in His Tabernacle. They say that "Vatican II" did not "do away with" the teaching...the "mandate" and that all who do not wear the mantilla (veil) are in disobedience to the Church.


This post is not about the validity or lack thereof of such argument/debate/opinion/accusations.

This post is about another topic: Pride.

I've been pondering this whole thing lately because a dear friend of mine, whose family DOES wear the mantilla, has started her own online business where she is selling lovely handmade ones in a personal effort to restore this humble devotion in the Church community.

When I was a child (and, having been born in 1964, I am a *post* Vatican II child, but nonetheless) the mantilla was still commonly worn at Mass. I LOVED it. What little girl doesn't enjoy placing a veil atop her head?

In fact, when we were young and played "Church" or "Nun" as we often did, we used anything we could get our hands on to become a veil...bath towels, dish towels, sheets, blankets...you name it, we tried it.

I have been asking myself why I haven't encouraged my girls to return to this custom?

I have shamefully decided that the answer is "pride" (and  a tad bit of a lack of courage).

My "good" motivation in raising godly children has always been to try to inculcate the idea that we are not to attract attention to "ourselves" but rather, to CHRIST, within us...mainly through our example of godly-living and Christian JOY. This has always been my answer to "But what exactly is WRONG with blue hair, Mom?"
It is "wrong" because it draws attention to "us" instead of to CHRIST, within us. (That was a general example to make a general point...not meant to evoke a debate on hair style choices and/or color).


Continuing in that line of thought...I have hesitated to return to donning a mantilla because we have been without one for so long (none of my girls have ever worn it) that I fear that if we suddenly start showing up at Mass with veils on our heads...it WILL draw attention...and I don't want that! (Several families in our parish DO wear the mantilla).

However, I hang my head as I type this...because I realize that even THIS is "pride". It is a lack of courage, as well...

Should I not be willing to have a few looks thrown our way...a few whispers here or there...a few questions or comments after Mass...if, in my heart, I feel that this truly is a lovely act of humility and devotion to bow before the Lord and "cover" ourselves in His presence?

My pride always makes me worry about "what others think". I wouldn't want someone to think we were just wearing veils to be "part of a holy crowd". Believe me, I have heard MANY awful things said (EVEN BY CLERGY) about those who don the mantilla; and have, on several occasions, risen to the defense of people who choose to show their humble devotion to the Lord in this way.

Do I fear such backlash?

Do I worry that some would "think" that I am trying to be "holier than thou".

(Although, as my friend has said...better *holier than thou* than *worldlier than thou*!)

My thoughts reach out to the wider congregation...as a whole.

Why won't ALL of us women return to this beautiful tradition/custom if we, in our hearts, believe that restoration is in order if we are to combat the ways of the world and rise up for Christ in an anti and post Christian society?

Why would we NOT want to take part in something so good, so lovely, so humble?

I am asking myself these things.

Part of my own, personal answer, I know...is that I don't wish to associate myself with that certain "sect" of people who actually DO claim that we are sinning NOT to wear a veil...that the NO Mass is not valid...that the current Pope and many Popes back to whomever are not valid, etc...Though this group is a minority in the Church...it DOES exist...and many of those who subscribe to these mindsets DO wear a mantilla...

So, again...PRIDE/LACK OF COURAGE...I, who do not wish to associate with that type of person, fear participation in this lovely act of devotion because someone "MIGHT THINK" that I "am ONE OF THEM".

Pride and lack of courage.

My girls would readily, eagerly, and wholeheartedly don a mantilla tomorrow if I handed them out and said, "Let's wear these as a sign of our humility and devotion before Christ's presence in the Tabernacle".

Perhaps, I will learn from my children...and do the same.

Preparing to Prepare

I'm not sure why, exactly, but I'm really looking forward to Advent this year. I always look forward to it...but this year my eagerness for this Liturgical Season to arrive feels especially "eager".
This morning, that thought made me laugh; that I'm looking forward to the season of looking forward...I am preparing to prepare; anticipating the anticipation!

Advent is such a beautiful season; as are many in the Liturgical year.

One of my good blogging friends wrote that her goal for this year's Advent season is to "simplify"...in all ways: decor, activities, music...everything.

That sounds good.
It sounds right.
It sounds like just what I need.

You know the Scripture verse (Psalm 46:10) that says, "Be still and know that I am God"?
Well, all I have to do to feel peace inside is to THINK that verse. Have you ever noticed that?
Just pondering those words brings a quietness and restful joy to the soul.

This is how I see Advent.

A time to be still. A time to wait on the Lord. A time to rest in His quiet presence and look forward to the great celebration of the day of His birth.

Prepare our hearts, oh Lord; that we may right our paths and ready ourselves for Your coming!

For now, I will keep looking forward to looking forward.

Care to join me?

The Great Enabler

Modern psychology in analyzing destructive relationships identifies "enabling" as a way of helping a person with bad tendencies to continue his hurtful behavior. The Church has always taught that God writes the natural law on every heart, and places in the center of every man the desire for Him. So while on the human side enabling is bad and leads to all sorts of evil consequences, on the supernatural side, enabling by the Holy Spirit, the Great Enabler, is good and leads to our sanctification.

Father Gabriel of St. Mary Magdalene, O.C.D. writes in Divine Intimacy:

Although our soul is supernaturalized by sanctifying grace, our powers [intellect and will] strengthened by the infused virtues [faith, hope, and charity], and our actions preceded and accompanied by actual grace, still the manner of our acting always remains human, and is therefore incapable of uniting us perfectly with God, of bringing us to sanctity.

This sounds pretty hopeless on the surface, but let us kneel before God in all humility and listen further:

In fact, our intellects, although invested with the virtue of faith, are always inadequate in regard to infinite Being, and are always incapable of knowing God as He really is. Even following the truths of revelation, which tell us that God is One and Three, the ideas which we form about the Most Holy Trinity, the three divine Persons, and the perfections of God, always remain far short of the reality.

As long as we are on earth, we shall know God "through a glass darkly"; only in heaven shall we see Him "face to face" (1 Cor. 13:12). [If St. Paul struggles with this, why should we be surprised at our own limitations? Or worse, how can we ever be over-confident in our own perceptions?]

The inadequacy of our knowledge of God extends equally to our ideas of sanctity; the same short-sightedness that characterizes our view of divine things affects our notions of the way of perfection. In many cases we cannot even discern what is more perfect, and despite our good will, we often make mistakes, believing some things to be good and holy which really are not. [Man's capacity for self deception seems to be infinite. It is the reality of being human.]

However, complete union with God, which is sanctity, requires a perfect orientation toward Him, according to the first and greatest commandment of Jesus: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with thy whole heart, and with thy whole soul, and with thy whole mind" (Mt. 22:37); we have seen that this perfect orientation exceeds our powers, precisely because our knowledge of God and of the way which leads to Him is far too imperfect.

"Must we then renounce sanctity? Not at all! God, who wants our sanctification, has provided us with the means of attaining it: He has given us the Holy Spirit.

I like to think of the Holy Spirit as "The Great Enabler" because He takes the desire the Father has written on our hearts from the moment of conception and facilitates our moving toward sanctity - union with God. He knows what we need far better than we do and He prompts us in the stillness of our hearts. He is indeed the Comforter Christ promised us before ascending into heaven. He is the divine life within us.

When we are anxious, confused, heartbroken over adversities or in spiritual darkness; when we think we will never be good enough for heaven or when we think God has abandoned us and we don't really matter to anyone, we can pray with St. Augustine:

O Love of the eternal God, sacred communication between the omnipotent Father and His blessed Son, all-powerful Paraclete, most merciful Consoler of the afflicted, penetrate the innermost depths of my heart with Your powerful virtue; brighten with Your shining light any dark corners of that neglected dwelling of my soul. Visit it, fructifying with the abundance of Your dew, all that a long period of drought has dried up and choked. Pierce with the dart of Your love, the depths of my soul; penetrate the very center of my enervated heart and inflame it with Your salutary fire; strengthen Your creature by illumining, with the light of Your holy fervor, the inmost depths of my mind and heart.

I believe that each time You come into a soul, You prepare there a dwelling for the Father and the Son. Blessed is he who is worthy to have You as Guest! Through You, the Father and the Son establish their dwelling in him. Come then, most benign Consoler of suffering souls, Protector in all circumstances and Support in tribulations. Come, Purifier of faults, Healer of the wounded. Come, Strength of the weak, Restorer of those who fall! Come Master of the humble, rejecter of the proud! Come, O charitable Father of orphans, merciful Judge of widows! Come, hope of the poor, strength of the weak! Come, guiding star of sailors, harbor of the shipwrecked! Come, O unique beauty of all the living, and only salvation of the dying!

Come, O Holy Spirit, come and take pity on me! Clothe me with Yourself, and graciously hear my prayers, that, according to the multitude of Your mercies, my littleness may be pleasing to Your greatness, and my weakness to Your strength, through Jesus Christ, my Savior, who, with the Father, lives and reigns in unity with You, forever and ever. Amen."